It’s May!

The relief is palpable.   For some reason this year it felt like Spring was forever just around the corner.   But now it’s May and we can all relax.   Temperatures are still cool at night but the sun is feeling warmer and the flowers are causing a riot of color all over the city.

Being the 1st of May it is May Day, and friends of ours have a standing tradition on this day of making bouquets of flowers and leaving them for their neighbors.  (Actually, Kristin said that in their neighborhood in Portland, OR everyone does it.  I’d never heard of it before, but it’s lovely and the kids always have fun.)

So in honor of warmer weather and the lovely month of May, I give you flowers in photo if not in reality.   Happy May Day!

From left; Simon, Jonah, Maya S., Maya M., Ben

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Practicing empathy & compassion

I hesitate to say it, given the depth of the tragedies that took place in Boston & Texas (and some would say in the Senate) these past few days, but what has happened to our empathy and compassion?

We have it in spades when it comes to the victims of any crime we see as senseless – and of course it is deserving in those cases as well – but empathy for the victims is easy.  (Not misplaced, but easy.)

What about empathy for the perpetrators? What about compassion?

As the police in Boston closed in on the second bombing suspect yesterday – the younger Tsarnaev brother – I found myself hoping he would not be killed.    I have no idea what prompted this young man to take part in such a heinous endeavor – whether he was simply trying to impress an older brother or truly had some deep unmet needs and inner rage of his own – but all I could think was how sad it was.   How sad that his own promising life had come to this.   What if someone had been able to reach out to him on Monday morning, giving him the strength to walk away?   Sometimes all it takes is a kind word to change the course of a life.    Could that have happened?

We’ll never know, and if he is convicted (because another thing we seem to have forgotten is that in our system a person is innocent until proven guilty, and not the other way around) he will most assuredly be dealt the death penalty.   Many people will say he deserves it.

But I’m writing this, not to focus on young Mr. Tsarnaev, but on the rest of us.   We’re an angry mob who say we believe in peace only when things are peaceful but who quickly turn to judgment and calls for retribution and violence when tragedy strikes.  My belief is that if we can cultivate empathy and compassion in ourselves towards others – especially those who have wronged us – then we do ourselves and the world a much greater service than the anger, vitriol and hate we spew forth to anyone who will listen (as well as to those who won’t) whenever a tragedy occurs.

Showing empathy towards your enemy is not the same thing as condoning their acts.   In fact, only hate gives them power, empathy undermines it.

It sounds simple, but it isn’t.  I write this not just as a reminder to others but also to remind myself that not all evil acts are perpetrated by evil people.  That in fact most people have the capacity to love and show kindness, even if they have lost their way.

As the very wise Dalai Lama XIV said, ““You must not hate those who do wrong or harmful things; but with compassion, you must do what you can to stop them — for they are harming themselves, as well as those who suffer from their actions.” [Added emphasis is mine]

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A little slice of ‘Sandman’ history

They call Mariano Rivera “Sandman” because usually when he enters a game for the Yankees, it’s lights out for the other team.   No other closer in baseball history even comes close, with well over 600 saves and a post season ERA that is so low you think it must surely be a typo.  (It’s 0.70 in case you’re wondering.)

None of which was on my mind last night when we arrived at Yankee Stadium to watch the Yanks play the Arizona Diamondbacks.    We had train delays and the game started while we were making our way to our seats.

By the time we sat down, the score was 2-0 Diamondbacks.   C.C. Sabathia, usually a solid starter, had given up two runs in the top of the first inning.

And so we settled in to enjoy the view, if not the game.

A few innings later, Arizona scored again making it 3-0, and although Sabathia settled down, the Yanks couldn’t buy a base-runner and the first 6 innings flew by in under two hours.   We considered leaving early to beat the crowds, but baseball fans are nothing if not overly confident, and on the off chance that the team could get it together, we stayed.

The baseball gods smiled on us.

In the bottom of the 7th the Yankees rallied and tied the game, and a wave of excitement rippled through the seats.   A familiar figure rose in the bullpen behind center field and began to get loose.

Sabathia pitched through the 8th, and as the Yanks came to bat in the bottom of the inning I thought, “Oh no.  Extra innings.”   Extra innings were something I just didn’t want.  Rivera might come in and pitch two innings, but if the Yanks failed to score he’d be replaced and then all bets would be off.

Which is when I looked up at the scoreboard and saw that Travis Hafner was coming to the plate.   We haven’t followed the Yankee roster very closely lately, so I am unfamiliar with Hafner.    I leaned over to my friend Rebecca, whose family was also at the game, and said, “Man, I really don’t want to sit here for extra innings.”  and then I said loudly, “Ok dude, this is your moment.   We need a solo shot home run right now.” (No, of course he couldn’t hear me.  It doesn’t matter.  That’s what fans at games do.)  And on the next pitch, that’s exactly what we got.  Hafner hit a solo home run over the right field wall and Rebecca looked at me and said, “I can’t believe it!”  as we were all jumping up and down like crazy people.

The jumping up and down? Yes, it was because the Yanks took the lead in somewhat dramatic fashion, but also?

Enter Sandman.

Last pitch of the game

In typical Rivera fashion, it was 3 up and 3 down for Arizona and we all got to enjoy a little slice of history.

No, it wasn’t an important game.  Barely two weeks into the season, the Yanks are riddled with injury and struggling to stay above .500.   No one will look back on this game as pivotal to the season or particularly significant in any way.

It doesn’t matter.  We got to see the greatest closer in baseball history – who is currently the oldest active player in the major leagues & in the final season of his incredible career – do what he does best.

1,2,3.  Lights out.

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A Walk in the Park

Spring finally arrived this week, rolling in yesterday with temperatures warm enough to cause much shedding of jackets and donning of shorts and t-shirts.    In New York City, the first truly warm day is heralded by heading to Central Park to lay in the grass, or play some frisbee, or take a rowboat out on the lake, or dip your feet in fountain or any number of other things we’ve all been dreaming about ever since the official beginning of Spring (otherwise known as the last snowstorm of the season).

For Maya and me, it meant an afternoon in the sun with our cameras….

The Sheep Meadow

Poet's Alley

Bethesda Fountain

Arches at Bethesda

How cute is the flower girl? (This was one of 3 couples we saw having wedding photos taken)

Top of the Cherry Hill Fountain - and the sun!

Sunset on the Hudson - from Riverside Park Terrace

Trump's newer buildings, seen at twilight, walking up from Riverside Park

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My latest Pop Culture update

I hereby present the things I’m enjoying right now, and that I recommend for anyone.  Or at least to those who have a healthy love of pop culture and an equally healthy ability to suspend disbelief around certain – shall we say – less than plausible plot lines.  (I’m looking at you, “Revolution”.)

We’ll call these first two the “Thank God those awful mid-season replacement shows are over” category.

1)  ”The Voice” is back!  Yes, Cee Lo Green and Christina Aguilera are taking a season off, but Usher is great and Shakira, though still questionable, might wind up surprising everyone.   Adam Levine (or “Ben’s friend Adam” as he is known in our house) is adorable as always, along with the equally adorable (and hands down winner of Best Laugh) Blake Shelton.   Talent is looking awesome, and I think this season may wind up being the best yet.

[By the way, if you have never seen The Voice but like singing, you should watch.  This is a positive show.  No running down the contestants or being insulting - just encouragement and great tips for those who don't make it past auditions.]

2.  The aforementioned “Revolution”!  Oh thank all the gods that this show is back.  We really, really tried to like “Deception” (mostly because Jack Bristow – I mean Victor Garber – was in it, but it was just deep down awful and we finally gave up on it a mere three episodes from finally finding out Who Killed Vivian Bowers Already!  (And I don’t care and never thought of it again once we stopped watching which means it was REALLY AWFUL.  I will watch schlock, people, with no shame.  This was bad.)

So, yeah, “Revolution”!  Yay for a show produced by J.J. Abrams that has tons of little inside writer’s jokes revolving around stuff like Texas and Ben Affleck.  Curious now, aren’t you?    Also, it’s just fun.  And it stars Billy Burke.  Who is awesome.  Suspension of disbelief necessary but willingly done.

Ok, moving on to the “Great Foreign TV Shows we never knew about so thank you Amazon Prime!” category.

3.  ”Dance Academy” is free for Prime members and has over 40 episodes available.  Fantastic 1/2 hour show about kids who get into Australia’s National Academy of Dance in Sydney.  I love it.  Love it!  Appropriate for everyone and just all around good.

4.  ”Ripper Street”  This almost didn’t make the list.  In fact I’m still on the fence about it, and I had  heard of it before, so Amazon doesn’t take all the credit (It’s a BBC show, which usually means it’s better than 99% of anything on U.S. TV without even trying).   But even though it stars Matthew MacFadyen (You all know him.  He was Mr. Darcy in the most recent “Pride & Prejudice” with Keira Knightley) I just can’t decide if I like it.  It’s not light watching, not appropriate for kids and maybe too dark for me.  We’ll see.

Next we have the “Books” category:

5.  Chic lit often equals lots of sub-par writing but in this case I am making an exception.  Lee Nichols wrote Tales of a Drama Queen and Hand-Me-Down.  They are cleanly written, funny and even moving at times.  Published sometime in the early 2000′s, they are not new and I picked them up from a street bookseller a while back.  Probably available from the library or used on line.  Great light reading, great characters.

6.  Case Histories by Kate Atkinson.  Atkinson has a new book out called Life after Life that is getting raves, and that I plan to read soon.  Histories hit the U.S. in 2008 (and I think the BBC made a series of it which I may need to check out) so I’m a little behind,  but I loved this book.  Intricate, compelling and beautifully written.  Get it.

Moving on to “Movies I liked and one I hated (and why)”

7.  ”Admission” – So much better than the preview leads you to believe.  Not just silly slapstick, but a great story with more depth than many will expect.   And Michael Sheen!  AND Lily Tomlin!!

8.  ”The Gatekeepers” – This should be required viewing.  A documentary which interviews six previous leaders of Shin Beit, which is the Israeli security/anti-terrorism unit.   These guys are insightful, realistic, empathetic and so interesting I never wanted it to end.  You’ll gain tons of perspective about the situation in Israel from watching this film, from the guys who’ve been ‘in the trenches’ so to speak for the last 35 years.  Fantastic.

9.  ”Oz the Great & Powerful” –  I loved it. I loved how it started and how they picked up story threads and set pieces that lead, 25 years later, to Dorothy’s arrival in the original film.  Good fun for any Wizard of Oz fans.

10.  The one I hated.  ”Beautiful Creatures”.   Oh screenwriter, what did you do?  How did this happen?  This is a book series that should have been better on film, especially with our current CGI and special effects abilities.  It has characters that scream to be made flesh by wonderful actors.   And the film HAD those wonderful actors, which makes the result that much more disappointing.    I won’t go into details, because if you haven’t read the books (which by the way, I recommend) the details won’t have much impact, but I will say this:  Whoever decided that it was ok to do away with the MAIN impediment to our two leading characters ever having a chance to be together?  You need to be fired.  You see, the main character is a young witch, or caster,  who does not know if she will turn dark or light (something that happens on her 16th birthday).   She falls for a boy who is not a caster and of course both their families disapprove, BUT….   When they touch some sort of current is created that causes the boys heart to malfunction.  And if they touch or kiss too ardently or for too long, it actually endangers his life.

Which they left out of the film.   Along with much of the plot and virtually all of the intrigue.  I predict there will be no sequel.

(Oh and they did away with the best prop piece EVER!  The red lollipop!  The siren’s red lollipop!  Why?  WHY???)

I spent an entire day after we saw that movie re-writing the script in my head.   Actually I decided it would work better as a TV series and could easily outline 5 seasons if asked….

So there you have it.  When I’m not arguing with people on Facebook or writing over on UnschoolingNYC, I’m knee deep in pop culture of one sort or another.  Often with my kids or my husband.   Which makes it all the more fun.

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The Easter Story

Easter is a strange amalgam of traditions.   It encompasses pre-Christian pagan fertility rituals (eggs and egg hunts), overlaps with Passover both in date and events, and of course contains the fantastical Christian story.

As a kid I knew none of this, of course.  The Easter Bunny always visited and left an Easter basket for me and my brother somewhere in our yard.   We always got new outfits and we went to church and listened to the story; how on Palm Sunday Jesus went to Jerusalem and was greeted by throngs of followers; how he celebrated at a dinner with his disciples, and after the meal he exhorted them to drink wine and eat bread (his body and blood) in remembrance of him.

Then he was betrayed, arrested and sentenced to die on the cross.   Which he did.  His body was taken from the cross, anointed with oil, wrapped in linens and put in a cave.   Three days later – Easter Sunday – when, as the story goes, Mary Magdalene and some other women went to the cave they saw the stone rolled away and Jesus’ body gone.   He then appeared to them and told them not to fear, that he had risen and was going to join his Father in heaven.

Growing up I heard this story every year.   I had no idea that the Last Supper was in fact a Passover Seder.  If it was mentioned by anyone in the church I didn’t register it, because I grew up in a town where no one celebrated the Jewish holidays and I didn’t know what they were.   I also believed that the story was literally true.   There was no reason not to believe it.  Everyone I knew spoke of it as though it had actually happened just that way.  In the Lutheran Church members recite either the Apostles Creed or the Nicene Creed every Sunday of the year, both of which include these words:

“[He] was conceived by the Holy Spirit and born of the Virgin Mary; He suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried.  He descended into hell.  On the third day he rose again, in accordance with the Scriptures and ascended into heaven.  He is seated at the right hand of the Father…”

So, you know, you kind of hear it a lot.

At some point, and I couldn’t tell you exactly when it was, I started thinking that maybe this hadn’t literally happened.  I read stories from mythology that seemed to mirror the Christian story, though they were written much, much earlier.   I traveled and met people who had different beliefs and I realized that just because I’d heard it presented as truth didn’t make it so.

After I married Joshua, I decided to study with an Orthodox Rabbi to see if conversion to Judaism was the right thing for me.   By that point I no longer identified myself with a religion, and I honestly thought that if it would make it easier for Joshua’s Israeli family to accept that he’d married a shiksa, then it didn’t really matter to me.  (Not the best reason to convert, but there have been worse.)

So I began meeting weekly with an Orthodox Rabbi named Samuel Rosenberg.  He lived in Elizabeth, New Jersey and upon initially greeting me and Joshua he told us that according to Jewish Law we were not really married.   And I thought “Nice to meet you, too.”

But after that, we got along famously.  I knew more about the Bible than he was expecting, and he was far more knowledgeable about Christianity than most Christians I had ever encountered.   In addition to the assigned lesson for the week, our sessions often turned into Q&A’s where I would ask about the interpretation of a given story and he would pull down huge books from his library and tell me the differing theories from various notable rabbis.  I enjoyed myself immensely.

When Passover rolled around, I realized that what I’d been calling Communion my whole life – that moment in church where you drink wine and eat bread and hear the Last Supper story and are told you’re drinking Christ’s blood and eating his body – is actually the Jewish ritual of kiddush.   Kiddush is practiced to remember the Sabbath on Friday evenings after the meal, but also at Passover and other holidays.  It involves the drinking of wine and the eating of a bit of challah (or at Passover, matzoh) and reciting specific verses from Genesis.

Huh!  My Lutheran trained brain was amazed.   But it was about to be blown away entirely.

While we were on the subject of Passover, and after I’d realized (and mentioned to Rabbi Rosenberg) about communion/kiddush I asked him:  ”So Christians say that Jesus died and then rose from the dead 3 days later.  What do the Jews say happened to him?”

Rabbi Rosenberg sat back in his chair and pushed his kipah (yarmulke) around on his head for a few seconds – a habit he had before telling a story – and then he told me.   In Judaism, when someone dies their body must be buried under the earth within 24 hours.  This is because it is considered disrespectful – not to mention unhealthy to the living – to allow a body to begin to decay.   (Of course embalming is out of the question, being a pagan ritual.)  However, it is also believed that if a righteous person, such as a rabbi or holy man, were to die and for some reason their body was not interred in the earth in the prescribed amount of time, God would not allow the body to decay until it was buried.   So, he told me, when Jesus was crucified, his body was taken from the cross but not buried.  He was placed in a cave and not in the earth.   As a result, some Jews came in the night and took his body to give him a burial befitting a rabbi.

You know those pictures of stairs where they can appear to be going either up or down, depending on how you look at it?   And you know how for a while you can only see the stairs going up, but then all of a sudden – like a revelation – you can see them going down too?

That’s how I felt when I heard Rabbi Rosenberg tell me this story.  It was right there in front of me the whole time.  And it made perfect, absolute sense.    Jesus was a rabbi.  He deserved a respectful Jewish burial.  And he got one.

My friend Jeff took this today

Since that day my take on Easter has been very different.   It is still a joyous day, celebrating renewal and life.  Today it even felt like Spring and the hats were out on Fifth Avenue for the Easter Parade.   On my family’s farm new lambs are being born.  The earth is waking up from winter.    And as for religion?  A few years ago a minster at All Souls Unitarian Church here in  Manhattan said that the real miracle of Easter was not Jesus’ death, but his life.  He is a historical figure with an amazing life story; a man who defied the strict rules of Jewish law by preaching that the only law, the only teaching that mattered was love and forgiveness.

Easter is an amalgam of the pagan, the Jewish and the Christian.  It’s full of great stories, and although I believe we might all be better off to realize that they are more fiction than fact, it does not make them any less powerful.   All of us have had the experience (at least I hope all of you have) of reading a novel or some other work of fiction that was so moving or powerful that we never wanted it to end; it stayed with us and in some cases changed our lives.   Should we toss it out because it wasn’t true?

In this season of Spring, this Easter season,  I think of Rabbi Rosenberg, and how he went from informing me I wasn’t really married to telling me I could study with him for as long as I wanted and was always welcome in his home (despite my decision not to convert).   I think of how empowering it is, not to believe something just because you’ve been told to, but to discover the truth and still appreciate the fiction.

Happy Easter everyone.   I wish you the gifts of renewal, acceptance and love.

And many great stories.

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My almost Spring photo walk

For the past few days it’s felt almost like Spring around here.  Almost, but not quite.  Meaning that you see the sun and check the temperature and think, “Wow, it’s almost 50 degrees!” and so you don’t wear your heavy coat and you prepare to go out and be comfortable.

The problem is that ALMOST 50 degrees is still somewhere in the upper 40′s and when it is damp (which it always seems to be when the temperatures are in the 40′s) it does not feel like early Spring but instead like late Winter and you really wish you’d worn a heavier coat.

Such was my situation Wednesday afternoon when I decided to take my camera and go out in the Spring sunshine to take some photos.   I got as far as 72nd Street before deciding that really, an outdoor walk to take photos was not going to be that much fun.

Proof that looks can be deceiving....

So I went inside; first to Urban Outfitters, and then to The Paper Source, with a quick walk past Fairway’s flowers & fruits in between.      Here are the best of the results, while we wait – not so patiently – for Spring.

Or in my case, "Dusty Ovens"

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Tips on travel

A few days ago I read an older post from Penelope Trunk titled “4 Reasons traveling is a waste of time”.   In it, she mentions that, as a kid,  her parents “took her all over Europe and the Caribbean” and that it exhausted her.    She then lays out her four reasons for opposing travel.

I’m not going to address Penelope’s four points one by one.   I disagree with her basic premise and believe that if done right, travel is anything but a waste of time.

Notice I said “if done right”.   I’m not speaking about business travel, which would definitely be exhausting after a while, but travel for pleasure.   In order to get the most out of it and not feel like you’ve wasted money (and time), there are a few things you should know and about which you should be completely realistic.

First and foremost among these is:

What kind of traveler are you?

No trip, no matter how exciting it may sound, will be enjoyable if you ignore this point.  For instance, some friends of mine love the website couchsurfing.org.   They have traveled all over the world through this network, taking advantage of the hospitality of like-minded strangers and offering the same in their home.    And while parts of this sound great to me, I know that it would never work for our family.  My daughter, when hearing about it, said, “Yuck!  I would never want to do that!”   And you know what?  That’s ok.  Better for us to be realistic than plan an extensive couchsurfing trip and then hate it.

So make a list.  Do you prefer staying in self-catering apartments or full-service hotels?  Do you love camping or traveling in an RV? Would the idea of swapping homes with someone appeal to you?  (If so, you can check out homeexchange.com.)  If you prefer hotels, what kind of hotel?   Youth hostel, budget, luxury?   Do you want to travel by train or rent a car or hike from place to place?   Can you make do with a carry on sized bag for a week of travel or do you need a mini version of your closet at home?   Do you want to “unplug” while you are away or be able to post photos on FB and Instagram every day?   If you are camping, do you prefer KOA campgrounds or off the beaten path?   Are you an adventurous eater?  Do you love going to a place where you don’t speak the language & fearlessly utilizing your pocket phrase book?    What kind of climate do you prefer?  Do you love organized tours or wandering around on your own?

Be brutally honest.  Now is not the time to feel bad about not wanting to camp in the outback and pee in a hole.   You must know your own travel personality (and that of your family) if travel is to be enjoyable.

But then…

Once you know what kind of traveler you are, stretch yourself

Right. So you’ve determined that you love the beach, cannot travel without at least 5 different pairs of shoes and never want to cook for yourself, make a bed or share a bathroom when you travel.  5 star hotels are your faves, but you’ll go 4 star in a pinch.

That’s great.  Now camp for a night.   Or sleep in someone’s den. Take a day or two and hike in the mountains or go canoeing on a river.

If you stretch yourself you will get more out of any trip.  You will learn a lot, even if it’s just “Yep, I still don’t love camping.”   Chances are, though, you’ll come away with at least one or two good stories if you go out of that well established comfort zone, even if only for a few days.    And you never know, you might find that you actually LOVE camping because the tents are so much better than you remember as a kid and you realize that what you hated was the smell of musty canvas and a saggy, dripping top caused by not pulling the ropes tight enough!

Know your budget

If a trip costs more than you can really afford, you aren’t going to enjoy it.  Sure it’s a “once in a lifetime” thing, but over-stressing your budget is the surest way to ruin a trip.  You’ll have overly high expectations for one, and if any unforeseen expenses pop up (as they almost always do) your ability to deal with them in a graceful and stress-free manner will be greatly challenged.

Get Creative

This is where the proverbial rubber meets the road.   Trying to cram 5 star tastes into a 1 star budget, for instance.   Balancing your husband’s love of surfing with your kid’s yearning for the desert.   Satisfying your own penchant for exotic spices with everyone else’s meat and potato palates.

It can be done.

Today more than ever there are so many options to help you out.  Even websites like Expedia or Kayak are great for tips & cheap flights, and no matter what your preferred destination, you can find on line sites, blogs and travel tips on how to get the most out of your time and dollars spent.     Ask friends for their advice (bearing in mind your own travel preferences and limitations, which may be different than theirs).   Maybe instead of one large trip you would be better served breaking it down into 3 or 4 shorter trips.   Maybe this year you travel domestically on shorter trips (which in the U.S. still gives you a multitude of diverse options) and next year you do one larger trip overseas.   Maybe you spend 3 days in the lap of luxury rather than two weeks at a Motel 6.

The options are endless, and as long as you approach them in the spirit of adventure and discovery with a good dose of “realism” thrown in , travel will never be a waste of your time.

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Ben is 9 today

It seems like just yesterday he was a smiling baby, new to the world and already breaking hearts.

And today he turned nine.  He is still smiling and breaking hearts.  He is mellow and happy and just an overall joy to be around.   Today he had cake and opened gifts and we went bowling and sang karaoke.   In between he played Minecraft and his new Super Mario Bros 2 game.   It was a really good day.

And even though sometimes I wonder how it’s possible that my baby boy has been on this earth for nine years already, I wouldn’t turn back time.   With Ben, and Maya too, the older they get the more fun we have.

Happy 9th Birthday, my sweet boy!

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Meet Wally

When we went to the Humane Society yesterday to see what cats they had for adoption, I was doing my best to keep expectations low.

Cosmo was going to be a very hard act to follow, and I feared that any cat we might find, no matter how sweet, would never be as loving and gentle as he was.

The director of adoptions met us and after speaking with her for a few minutes, telling her about the loss of our cat, she said, “I think you should meet Wally.”

She went on to tell us that they don’t know where Wally came from.  Someone dropped him off at their door, and he was so well-cared for, albeit a bit beat up (nick in his ear from a street fight), that they thought someone might come looking for him.  No one did.  He had a microchip that was never activated.  Whoever put him out didn’t want him anymore.   The assistant then brought him out – a beautiful soft tiger stripe with a copper brown nose.   The director said, “Watch this” and picked him up, holding him on his back like a baby.  ”What cat will let you hold him like this?”

We all started to smile, because we did know one cat that had routinely let himself be held just like that.

Before we left, Wally had napped on Ben’s lap and eaten treats from our hands.  It was basically love at first sight.

Today we went and got him, and we’ve all decided that he was meant to be with us.  Maybe he is Cosmo’s great, great, great grandnephew 5 x removed, and the loving, laid back gene got handed down straight to Wally.

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